Miss Caroline Krafft

Last weekend, I headed to our local theme park with my cousin for a day of fun.
Little did I know that by the end of the trip, I would be reminded of a life lesson I learned from the movie Mean Girls. That's right, Mean Girls. Think back with me if you will to the scene when Kady is competing against Marymount Prep with her fellow mathletes. She is chosen to compete against Caroline Krafft and in that moment she has a groundbreaking realization that I think we all need to have.

"Miss Caroline Krafft seriously needed to pluck her eyebrows. Her outfit looked like it was picked out by a blind Sunday school teacher. And she had some fifty-cent lipgloss on her snaggletooth. And that's when I realized, making fun of Caroline Krafft wouldn't stop her from beating me in this contest. Calling somebody else fat won't make you any skinnier. Calling someone stupid doesn't make you any smarter. And ruining Regina George's life definitely didn't make me any happier. All you can do in life is try to solve the problem in front of you."

That quote alone should be enough to make you think, but now I am going to layer it with my own personal experience. As we were walking out of the park we passed a man with his ears gauged. I'm talking huge gauges. Many individuals tend to think things like: Why would you do that?! He will never get a job! I'll be honest, that was my first reaction. Then I stopped and was real with myself for a second. That man could be the very best at whatever it is he does in life. His gauges don't stop him from being an incredible person. It was at this point that Kady and I had the same realization. We're all different and that doesn't stop us from being great.

I think the world would be a better place if we all strived a little harder to stop buying into the stereotypes many of us learn from a young age. I understand that there are many things that may turn you away from a person but I do not think appearance should be one of them.  

Keeping Focus

What is your focus?

Are you focused on how many things are going wrong?
Are you focused on the love of your family?
Are you focused on how you're going to pay the bills this month?
Are you focused on believing life will work itself out?

Life is tough. Everyone everywhere has difficulties in their life. We are all different so don't waste your time comparing your struggles to another's. Just know that we all have battles we would rather not fight. These challenges throw our brains off track. They tend to alter our course of thinking.

Sometimes we get so caught up in thinking about how we are going to overcome life's difficulties that we lose our focus on what is truly important. For me, my most important focus is my faith. (Like before, I know this is not everyone's most important focus - we're all different!) Figure out what drives you and make sure you keep it in focus.

The moment I realized just how off focus I was, I worked hard to change my thoughts. I suddenly felt a weight lift off my shoulders. While I am still having to work hard to take care of everyday challenges, I am also much happier. Things don't seem so daunting! Don't let your focus become overrun with the difficulties.

 Keep your focus and thrive.

Fall Down Seven, Get Up Eight

The last two weeks of my life have been a whirlwind of negativity. As hard as you fight to keep negativity locked out, sometimes it manages to find a way in. That is exactly what happened to me, but I'll save you the details of the events and individuals that tried to steal my joy. This isn't a post looking for sympathy, instead I'd rather inform you on how I told that negativity it was NOT welcome here.

I have to let my feelings out. I know many of you are not that way and like to keep things bottled up. I think it can be beneficial to everyone to say their feelings out loud, no matter how nasty they might be. Yes, you will probably say things you don't mean out of frustration, but better to say it to a trusted friend than to let it bottle up and be blurted out to the wrong person. Another great option is to write it out. Let it out on paper and when you're done, rip it to shreds. When we let our feelings out, it allows us to move on.

Next, I ensure I have someone I know will give good advice. Disclaimer: you may not always agree with their advice and you do not have to take it. More than anything, this person gets you thinking about the situation from a different angle. For me, this is my mother. She always manages to validate my feelings but also help me to think about the situation from a different perspective. This helps to lighten the load on my shoulders. While it doesn't make the situation right, it still allows me to logically reason through it.

Finally, I remember that NO ONE deserves to have such power over me. When I allow someone to upset me, they are in control of my emotions, not me. This is the hardest part for me. It isn't easy to just "move on." We have to remember that no one deserves the right to anger us. If we let our emotions take control, they have won. They have inflicted exactly what they wanted to. Do not give them that gratification.

Be confident and live your life. Don't you dare let someone's words stop you from standing up for what you believe in. "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." -Eleanor Roosevelt